I gave

I gave you a piece of my heart,
You gave me a piece of yours.

I gave you a little more,
You gave me a little more.

With every piece I was giving,
I got more of yours,
You got even more of mine.

The pieces I got,
I cherish every drop,
I love every bit.

Yet I know,
Yet I know,
I don't have it all.

A piece I do not have,
A piece I can not cherish.

It belongs to another,
It is something I'll never have.

I gave you my heart,
You have it all.

I gave you it all,
But I know,

I'll never have yours,
whole at all......................

Upon

Upon my soul, lives the demons of my past,
upon my soul, lives the scars of my damnation,
upon my brow is the sweat of a thousand lifetimes,
upon my cheeks, are the stains of a billion tears....

In my mind, the haunts live, deep inside, never coming out....

Upon my life, there is a blotch, upon my skin, there is a stain.... unremoveable, uneraseable.....
Upon me lives the pain, upon me lives the pain, unbearable, unstoppable....
Upon my soul, lives the demons of my past, upon my soul, lives the scars of my damnation, upon my brow is the sweat of a thousand lifetimes, upon my cheeks, are the stains of a billion tears....

8:01 am on 7/8/10

An Angel's Words

I know the feelings, Of losing a friend, I know the feelings, 

Of losing someone dear,

 Just remember, 

What a little angel told me, 

When I lost my friend, 

When I lost someone dear,

 As his little hand touched my shoulder, 

And the tears ran down from my eyes, 

I heard him say, I heard his sorrow, "Don't worry Miss/ Mister. For she/he is in heaven. Preparing your wings, for when you both, are once again, Reunited." 

 My tears were true, 

My pain eased a bit, 

I went to hug, 

This little angel,

 But he was gone,

 Without a trace.

 I offer these words to you, In your time of loss, In your time of pain, As they helped me, May they also help you.

Wind whipping

Wind whipping,
sky grey and black.
Leafs blowing,
rain drops falling.

Your hair blowing in the wind,
like millions of threads flowing in a river.
Soft arms around me,
flowing hair on my chest,
caressing your warm body.

Soft rosy lips pressed against mine,
kissing you softly,
with my love.

Silky hands holding mine,
soft as the finest silk.
I love you...
...always.

11/17/88

Why did I...

Why did I cause you pain,
that hit like a freight train,
why did I do it?
I hurt you,
I hurt,
my chest feels heavy,
I’m sorry doesn’t help,
to relieve the pain we both have inside.
I can’t get you off my mind,
I love you so.
Hold me once more
as we did before
Love came first,
pain was unthought of.
If you will not have me
then no one shall...
...ever more...

Why

Hold me near
hold me dear
never let me go
I need you so.

You let me go,
why?
I thought we had
that special spark.

My love was true
what did I do
to loose you?

Was it another?
Is it another?
Tell me why
you love this other.

Was I pushy,
or too mushy?
I need to know,
why you don’t hold me near,
why you don’t hold me dear...
...anymore.

11/13/88

Welcome

Welcome...

Welcome to hell,
where I have been,
all my life,
pain, suffering, strife,
unseen blood,
all over.
Hearts ripped out,
by ones we love.
Stomped on again,
and again.
Destroyed,
given pain by my parents,
because I want to do.
Taking out on one younger,
face me,
attack the stronger one,
never the ones,
who doesn’t deserve,
living in hell,
where I have been.